Story by Danielle Moffat
John Legend sang it best, “We’re just ordinary people” who are flawed, confused, both yearning and sick of love, and in dire need of taking it slow and thoughtfully reflecting on the state of our relationships. Love goes through phases, but a heartfelt and maybe heartrending decision becomes necessary when it becomes insalubrious. I can say without hesitation or need for statistical verification that every adult has experienced days where “love hurts, love scars, love wounds and marks.”
Experiencing bad relationships does not make us better at avoiding them because human beings are comprised of layers – some more visible than some. It is sometimes impossible to detect the traits in others that can be detrimental to your health and happiness. Should you, against your better judgement, find yourself in a bad relationship and have realised that you are not your best self, then resist the urge to walk the well-worn path of folly and run because your life depends on it!
Relationship dealbreakers include a partner that is a perpetually frigid communicator, a narcissist who is quick to pinpoint the mistakes of others, serial cheaters, and spendthrifts. Someone who cannot control their anger or have substance abuse problems should also be avoided for a peaceful life. One cannot find peace in relationships that create stress, and it should never be your job to change someone. Choose instead to support from a healthy distance.
There is no magic formula to decide which unhealthy relationship is worth salvaging; however, a solid piece of advice to follow is that if you or people around you see your relationship as harmful, it already qualifies for dissolution. Why would you persist in something that impacts your health and wellbeing? Should that not be enough reason to convince you to run for the hills?
If you are still unsure of whether you should stay in or leave an unhealthy relationship, then seek clarity by answering the following questions:
- Why did you decide to enter a relationship with your partner? Does this reason still exist?
- Can the problems that you are currently experiencing in your relationship be resolved easily? If not, what effort is needed on your part and that of your partner?
- Are you both willing to put in the work needed to eradicate the problem(s) from your relationship
- Would a professional third-party be of help?
- Is your partner still your best friend?
- What do you stand to lose or gain by leaving?
- Is the disagreement a dealbreaker? Long-suffering is considered a positive trait that shows one’s propensity for weathering trials.
Share this post:
Story by Danielle Moffat
John Legend sang it best, “We’re just ordinary people” who are flawed, confused, both yearning and sick of love, and in dire need of taking it slow and thoughtfully reflecting on the state of our relationships. Love goes through phases, but a heartfelt and maybe heartrending decision becomes necessary when it becomes insalubrious. I can say without hesitation or need for statistical verification that every adult has experienced days where “love hurts, love scars, love wounds and marks.”
Experiencing bad relationships does not make us better at avoiding them because human beings are comprised of layers – some more visible than some. It is sometimes impossible to detect the traits in others that can be detrimental to your health and happiness. Should you, against your better judgement, find yourself in a bad relationship and have realised that you are not your best self, then resist the urge to walk the well-worn path of folly and run because your life depends on it!
Relationship dealbreakers include a partner that is a perpetually frigid communicator, a narcissist who is quick to pinpoint the mistakes of others, serial cheaters, and spendthrifts. Someone who cannot control their anger or have substance abuse problems should also be avoided for a peaceful life. One cannot find peace in relationships that create stress, and it should never be your job to change someone. Choose instead to support from a healthy distance.
There is no magic formula to decide which unhealthy relationship is worth salvaging; however, a solid piece of advice to follow is that if you or people around you see your relationship as harmful, it already qualifies for dissolution. Why would you persist in something that impacts your health and wellbeing? Should that not be enough reason to convince you to run for the hills?
If you are still unsure of whether you should stay in or leave an unhealthy relationship, then seek clarity by answering the following questions:
Share this post: