Sex & Relationships

Touch Points for Explosive Sex

couple-kissing-bed

Say Goodbye to a Dull Sexual Experience

Let Dr. Karen Carpenter show you and your partner how to take it to the next level with the most mind-blowing sex.

The skin is the largest organ of the body and therefore provides the greatest surface area for sensual stimulation. There are some areas of the body that respond more easily to touch and pressure, heat and cold or vibration in both men and women. This is because the skin in that area of the body is particularly thin or the nerve endings are numerous. Some other ways of heightening your partner’s response therefore is by applying heat, cold, vibration and mouth play.

Fore-Love: Touch & Pressure

Have your partner lie flat on his/her back with arms and legs extended to the side. Get some scented massage oil and moisten your hands and fingertips. Now it’s time for some body-mapping. Through mapping your partner’s erogenous zones you will be able to give him/her much more pleasure.

Begin by tracing around the eyes, nose and mouth then proceed down the neck, arms and entire torso. Gently caress your partner from the face down, with a feather-light touch and have your partner signal to you where he/she enjoys being touched by moaning louder or softer. Try not to talk; pay attention to those extra sensitive areas. Have your partner turn over and lie on their stomach while you repeat the exercise. In many cases both men and women enjoy gentle pressure to the ear lobes, clavicle, neck, nipples, the centre line below the navel to the genitals, and the hands and feet. The nape of the neck,the shoulders, the spinal cord, as well as the tailbone, the mound of the buttocks and the back of the knees are all sensitive to gentle pressure. The feet have the highest concentration of nerve endings and bones which connect to every area in the body. Fore-love therefore does not always have to be “necking and petting”.

kissing-couple

Men

In men, the penis has a geography of its own. Various points along the shaft, the corona and the scrotum are highly sensitive to touch. Experiment by taking your time as your partner gives you feedback about his most erogenous zones. For many men the inner thighs and the perineum (that small triangle of flesh behind the scrotum) are particularly sensitive. This area is somewhat spongy and when rubbed with a gentle circular motion, can increase stimulation of the penis and thus improve the erection.

Women

If the woman is receiving the touching, place more emphasis on the entire abdominal area – expanding out from under the breasts and around the navel – in an arc ending at the pubic area. The space between the breasts, often neglected, is highly sensitive in many women – in tantric sex this area is the heart chakra and receives special attention. The pubic mound, the lips of the vagina, and first 3 inches into the vagina are sensitive to different touches, rubbing and thrusting. Locate the G spot, found some 2-3 inches inside the vagina, on the top wall. By gently applying rubbing pressure just left of the centre you should feel a small round ball becoming harder as you rub.Stimulating this area in most women provides intense pleasure.

The clitoris is the only organ designed solely for pleasure; it contains 80,000 nerve endings which is twice as much as in the penis. While many flowers have been used to describe the female genitals, the orchid comes the closest if we want to describe the way the clitoris works. So think of an orchid and the ends of the flower which hang below the open bud as its “legs”. Transfer that image to your partner’s clitoris and you will understand that as you stimulate that pea-shaped bud the sensation radiates throughout the flower. The clitoris actually needs about 5 – 10 minutes of gentle stimulation before it is ready for any forceful manual or oral stimulation. That’s because as you stimulate the bud, the flower becomes engorged and the blood flow to the clitoris causes it to stand on its legs, pushing upwards to receive even more stimulation… now you’re in the intense pleasure zone and heat and cold, a mixture of touches and moisture will all make your partner ecstatic. So the rule of thumb for the clitoris is slow and gentle for the first ten minutes, then pull out all the stops and enjoy.

During Sex

Now that you know the particular pleasure zones it’s time to use your map to set off some explosions in your partner’s body. The Kama Sutra speaks of surprising your partner during sex with nibbles, slaps and moans. Using these erogenous pressure points along with other forms of stimulation can increase sexual pleasure. You can apply pressure to these areas such as the nape or the perineum while limiting penile thrusting to the first thirds of the vagina and also while using fire and ice condoms. This should ignite the root chakras in the pelvis.

Vibration

We tend to think of vibrators as adult aids for women. That’s not entirely accurate. A number of smaller vibrators such as the bullet and the egg are designed for stimulating both men and women. Vibrating condoms also provide a useful alternative. If you and your partner are HIV negative and practising safe sex, you can remove the small vibrator and wrap it around your finger for greater stimulation of the perineum and the clitoris.

Kissing

Kissing adds the missing dimension when making love. The lips are covered in one of the most sensitive layers of skin and therefore bruise easily-but they also communicate pleasure that can be electrifying. Learning the art of kissing is really not something you can do on your own. If you are half-way decent at it already try reading the Kama Sutra, which describes over 30 types of kisses; these kisses are called mouth play. Take your eyes off the pictures and do a little reading, it will help to make you a gourmet in bed, not a glutton.